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[carnivore-x]

Alright, I don't know if I'm the first one to post a super meat boy story, but I think I am.   (Edit: Yes, it turns out I am. Cool!)
Anyhoo, here goes. Hope you like it. I present to you...(dramatic pause) THE REVENGE OF DR. FETUS!  


This is Dr. Fetus.
Nobody loves Dr. Fetus.
And that’s why Dr. Fetus hates you!
But most of all...
Dr. Fetus hates Meat Boy!
So he beat Meat Boy up...
And kidnapped Bandage Girl!!!
So what are you waiting for?
Go save her, hero!
SUUUPER MEAT BOY!
   
        Dr. Fetus glared at the insufferable game on the plasma screen, which horridly twisted his tragic story, portraying the wretched scum, Meat Boy, as a hero, and he himself as the villain. But nobody had ever took the time to hear his side of things.
   With an outraged cry, Dr. Fetus wrenched the X-Box out from under the T.V, and chucked it through the glowing plasma screen. An explosion of crackling electricity and fire burst forth, reminding him of the old days.
   This time, things would be different. The world would pay for what had been done to him.
   “I swear it!” he bellowed, and karate kicked the shattered screen.

The Revenge of
Dr. Fetus!

Chapter 0: The Prologue

   
        Dr. Fetus stomped around the smoking wreckage of the television. His black, finely made tuxedo suit and swishing cape were slightly torn by the rubble, but the robotic parts and the glass, monocled dome remained intact, as did his top hat. The explosion was a sore remembrance of what he had previously been capable of, before his second birth.
   His hired servant, Jensen, walked into the room.
   “Really, sir, that is the fourth one today,” Jensen said in a clipped British accent, pulling out a broom.
   “I hate him!” Dr. Fetus replied. “He gets all the attention, and I’m left in the dust, a husk of my former self!”
   “I know, sir. Please, calm down. You know what could happen.”
   Dr. Fetus glared at Jensen. He was in no mood to calm down.
   “I destroyed the world, and he still beat me!” he shouted, making Jensen wince. “I did every single thing I could, to destroy him and make...her...love me, and I lost. He won, dammit, Jensen, he won!”
   “Shall I get another game set up, sir? Shredding Meat Boy against your saw traps always seems to cheer you up.”
   “DON’T SAY HIS NAME!” Dr. Fetus bellowed, lunging at Jensen, who calmly stepped backward.
   “My apologies, sir. Would you like me to?”
   Dr. Fetus sighed bitterly. “Maybe. It does feel good, to see his constant look of surprise when I once again kidnap her, to throw him against Lil’ Slugger again and again, until his blood has caked all...”
   An exultant tone came into Dr. Fetus’s voice, and a glorious look appeared in his eyes, but it soon vanished.
   “But there will always come a time, when, once again, that fool will beat me. I can never play the game, for even if my character wins, I still lose.”
   He growled in frustration and kicked a chair. Jensen nodded, perfectly aware of his master’s vicious moods.
   “Very well, sir,” Jensen said, backing out of the room. Dr. Fetus barely acknowledged his going, instead sitting back on the couch.
   From a shirt pocket, he pulled a battered remote control, with a single button. It was a cruel reminder of what had come before. Before he had fallen, before she had crushed him, before his second birth. So many things he had done with this remote, so many ways to hurt that wretched, undying, skinless bastard. But his second birth had weakened his once sharp mind. The remote had been enough to get him into the world, and to help build him a new suit. That was all.
   He had tried, so many times, knowing that, if he could just repair the remote, he could restore himself to his former glory. In the right hands, that remote had done many things, and in the wrong, so much more. He smiled a bitter, wicked smile at the memories.
   The suit had been enough to get him to the other side of the world, away from her and that bleeding, pathetic beast she dated. Jensen, an unbelievably rich man, had found him, and soon found himself forcibly under the control of Dr. Fetus.
   With Jensen’s funds, Dr. Fetus had managed to take over that part of the world, soaking the soil with the vital juices of his opponents. His mind may have been lost, but he still had his raw, brute strength, and army of powerful supporters left over from the Rapture. He almost regretted the loss of that turncoat, Brownie. He had so much potential...
   With nearly unlimited funds, and Jensen as a personal servant, Dr. Fetus had relaxed into a casual life of luxury, his robotic suit finer than ever, the fluid inside keeping him alive, but he was always bitter, constantly reminiscing about what had been lost. He was nothing more than a common thug, these days. He didn’t deserve the title of Doctor, and he knew it.
   He thought back to his days of conquest. After his childhood, well into his peak years. He had done so much. It had begun with birth, really, but the final segment started in a flurry of fists, and a kidnapping...


There's the first part. I'll post more as time goes on. There should be 7.5 or 15 chapters, depending on how you look at it. The next part will probably be later today. I would put an emote here, but I'm pretty sure Dr. Fetus hates those.

[carnivore-x]

Alright, I can't wait that long to post the next part.  
So, here goes.

Chapter 1-The Forest

I

   Fists flying, Dr. Fetus lunged himself at Meat Boy, startling the poor fool out of his love-drunk reverie. His hands and feet smashed into Meat Boy’s face, knocking him back. The cowardly boy tried to hit back, but he was no match for Dr. Fetus’s brute force and cunning mind.
   Dr. Fetus left Meat Boy to bleed a few yards away, beaten to a nearly unconscious pulp. His eyes found Bandage Girl, standing there in stupefied horror. Had she recognized him? He thought not, but she might, eventually. He would help her along, if she didn’t. But not until the time was right. Then she would know what she had done, who it was that had captured her.
   Sprinting forward, he grabbed her tight, and launched himself into the sky, wings flapping. His powers of flight and teleportation were some of the great advantages of his suit. Meat Boy was such a moron, he thought he could contend with the raw power that was Dr. Fetus. Maybe Meat Boy would figure out where the two of them had gone. Maybe not. Dr. Fetus didn’t care. If the boy didn’t show up as quickly, that was more time to set traps. If he did, well, Dr. Fetus would save the best traps for later.
   Dr. Fetus teleported away, a screaming Bandage Girl still clutched in his arms. He reappeared, surrounded by pine trees and scraps of metal. It was a forest, of sorts.
   Large and wide, it had been Dr. Fetus’s childhood world. He spent rueful hours here, his nearly non-existent heart hating the world, only finding solace in his science experiments.
   The forest had used to be a beautiful place, not that Dr. Fetus cared, nor had he anything to compare it against. All its inhabitants had soon learned to fear him after so many had “contributed” to his experiments. The pathetic squirrels, doves, and ravens all took flight at the slightest sign of another living thing.
   Now, though, the forest was a dark and spooky place. Twisted scraps of metal were bent around the trees, digging into their bark, killing them. It suited Dr. Fetus well, all the pain he had caused here. Parts he had even set on fire, and they were still covered in darkening ashes. The forest was now half junkyard.
   These scraps of metal served a dual purpose. With his knowledge of science and mechanics, he quickly created a robotic saw, constantly running and sparking. It only stayed in one spot, but he didn’t care. There was plenty of time to improve later.
   “Meat Boy will save me,” a female voice said behind him. “He loves me.”
   Dr. Fetus turned. In the five reverent minutes it had taken him to build the saw, his gorgeous prisoner had taken time to survey the surroundings.
   “My dear, he cannot save you,” Dr. Fetus said, smirking. “There is nothing you can do.”
   “If he can’t save me, then I’ll escape.”
   Dr. Fetus lunged forward before she had a chance to react, and then she was held over his head in a tight grip.
   “You shall not escape,” Dr. Fetus seethed. “You are no match for all my traps. You would die if you tried to leave, and you do not know this forest like I do.”
   “That’s what you think, you monster,” she replied scornfully. “But Meat Boy and I used to play here as children.”
   Dr. Fetus was stung. They had been here before him? They had been together before he was born? The thought shocked him, shook him to his core. Soon, though, his constant state of comforting fury returned.
   “This forest has changed,” he replied. “It has changed quite a bit. There is more here than you know.”
   Which was true. She and Meat Boy had no idea of what lurked in the deepest parts of the woods, what he had hidden there. But they would find out eventually, when the forest collapsed around them.
   “Could you put me down?” Bandage Girl asked from above him, calm despite the circumstances. “It’s a bit annoying, being up here.”
   “Oh, I’ll put you down,” he growled, and lunged through the woods, still holding onto her. Branches slapped at them, but his lack of flesh meant he felt no pain. Bandage Girl, on the other hand, was a different story.
   “Ow! Those sting, you know,” she called down, but Dr. Fetus didn’t listen. He jumped off of a small hill, landing on an overhanging ledge. He didn’t have time to put traps here, he needed to bulk up on them later on.
   He locked Bandage Girl into the ground, practically gluing her feet in.
   “I’d love to see you get out of this,” he chuckled. “Of course, me getting you out will be rather painful...”
   “I’ll still get away,” she said, overconfident.
   “Your mouth is going to get you in trouble, dearie,” Dr. Fetus grimaced. “After all, I’ve set up a magic proximity alarm, both around you and around the forest itself. The instant anyone enters the forest, I'll know. The moment someone touches you, I’ll be back, to drag you somewhere else.”
   He left her, stunned and hurt, and vanished into the woods. He had work to do.


There you go, another part. Who knows, maybe I'll get carried away and finish the forest today, but maybe not.   We'll see.
Oh, if you find any typos/grammar errors, please let me know so I can fix them. Thanks.

[carnivore-x]

Alright, everybody, here comes the next part!
BTW, tell me what you think of it, please. I like feedback, it helps me improve.

II

   Sparks flew as Dr. Fetus began setting up his traps. The saws stayed in one place, but he was getting better. After he ran out of traps in an area, he moved onto the next one, building more and more advanced tricks. He’d love to see Meat Boy get through this!
   He paused at one section, a place that had formerly been home to a raging fire. A bit of a pyromaniac himself, he itched to set fire to it again. So he did. The place was smoking, the flames spreading. He loved the scent of the smoke, the suddenly charred squirrels, unexpectedly dying as their trees burned down. Birds took off into the smoke-choked sky.
   “These saws need more speed,” he muttered to himself. “They have to move, if they’re to properly slaughter Meat Boy.”
   He found himself in a cliff with some parts carved away. It reminded him of a cabin, almost. He put in the necessary sparking saws. In such tight confinement, it would be difficult for Meat Boy to get through. Dr. Fetus would constantly warp Bandage Girl through this gauntlet of areas, watching Meat Boy throw himself on saws again and again, until at last, he gave up. Then, Dr. Fetus would have true victory.
   The cabin-like place reminded him of his childhood. He might have even spent time there. Was this his lab?
   It was! What luck! Finding his very own laboratory from years past. He could still remember all the torture he had caused there...
   A young Dr. Fetus stood outside his lab. Inside, he could faintly hear the whirring and buzzing of saws, and just the slightest whimpers of animals.
   In front of him sat five baby squirrels. They had not yet learned to fear him, but he would teach them the hard way.
   “Here, my little pets,” he cooed, the sweet sounding voice making him sick. Still, it served a purpose. He needed them to experiment on.
   “It’s alright, little ones,” he continued in that repulsive voice. “I will not hurt you, I promise.”
   He toted a small burlap sack behind him, and it rustled the leaves softly as he slowly approached them.
   The squirrels squeaked, and crept closer to him. What thoughts were going through their puny minds? He didn’t know, or care enough to find out. What he did know was that he could influence their thoughts with just a little scent.
   He brought the bag forward. He had coated the inside with the juice from grilled nuts, a delicacy his animal prisoners had found delicious. He had hated that some of the squirrels got a treat before their deaths, but it too, had served a purpose.
   The baby squirrels lunged into the bag, all hoping for a taste of the charred nuts. Quick as a wolf, he yanked the drawstrings tight, and slung the wriggling sack over his shoulder, ignoring the pleading squeaks of the squirrels within. Somewhere, a mother and father squirrel would be missing their children. Served them right. It would be a lesson, to not let their babies go wandering.
   Perhaps they would come looking for the little squirrels. That would be useful, he could trap them as more subjects.
   He got them into the lab, and took them out of the sack one at a time. Some, he strapped to tables, to try out new torture methods. Others, he threw into the gauntlet, to test the effectiveness of his weapons. A few, he saved as his own personal, flaming display. He loved the sound of their screeches as they died. Music to his ears.
   
An incessant beeping drove Dr. Fetus out of his reverie. Meat Boy had entered the forest! Why was he here? Had he already figured it out?
   Maybe. But he hadn’t found Bandage Girl yet. Dr. Fetus hurried, finishing up his work and moving on. Moving saws, shooting saws, saws that were attached to a long metal girder, always spinning.
   Soon, he heard the tell-tale sign of Meat Boy reaching Bandage Girl. He teleported to where she was, and blasted her away with a large punch, leaving a shocked Meat Boy behind.
   He and Bandage Girl reappeared at the top of a cliff.
   “This should give him a little trouble,” Dr. Fetus muttered. He glanced at the defiant Bandage Girl.
   “How did he find you?” Dr. Fetus accused. “Did you call him?”
   “Please,” Bandage Girl scoffed. “We used to always come to the forest to think. There were parts of it that aren’t so horrible, not that you would know.”
   Dr. Fetus just shook his head, locked her up, and warped away. He had work to do.
   Seven recaptures of Bandage Girl later, he had just finished the final area. It didn’t leave him much time to complete his great obstacle. And these temporal portals that were appearing over the forest were a nuisance. A couple times he had fallen into one, but found it boring.
   He set Bandage Girl up behind his traps once again.
   “You’re sadistic,” she shouted. “Doesn’t this ever get old?”
   “Doubtful, my dear,” Dr. Fetus said, leering. “Besides, you’re still around, so it’s worth it.”
   She slapped the glass dome, and he recoiled. She still had fire, and was as flighty as before. He growled, caught between a hatred of her, and a need for her to love him. Hatred won out, and he smacked her before vanishing.
   The pattern repeated, and, having almost finished his little contraption, he simply sat in each area, to watch Meat Boy die. It was amusing, but rather irksome that he just kept coming back.
   As Dr. Fetus watched, he could see the animals running from Meat Boy, and dying against the robotic saws. Dr. Fetus grinned. It was still great to see them die, as well.
   He heard chattering and chirping behind him. He whirled, and saw a bunch of squirrels and birds. Were they...watching him?
   No, that was ridiculous. They were brainless lemmings, nothing more. Dr. Fetus lashed out, snapping a squirrel’s neck, and chucked it at the others, scattering them. Annoying pests. He should have done better to kill them.
   Soon enough, he had placed Bandage Girl behind the forest’s hardest gauntlet of traps. He smirked at her.
   “If Meat Boy reaches you here,” Dr. Fetus said. “He’s doomed.”
   “How so?” she asked, in spite of herself. She was genuinely curious.
   “You’ll see...” Dr. Fetus said with a knowing smile, and vanished to watch the fun.
   And what fun it was! Meat Boy died a good ten or fifteen times, and he hadn’t even come close to reaching her. Those shattering pillars of loose dirt always got him. Dr. Fetus chuckled wickedly.
   All too soon, though, Meat Boy got the hang of it, and the saws that were shot at him, the final obstacle, didn’t even bother him. Dr. Fetus growled as he got Bandage Girl lose in a series of slaps, and warped away. Meat Boy had survived all of his traps. All but the last one...
   Dr. Fetus smiled at the prospect. Tonight, he would complete several of his goals at once.
   Kill Meat Boy...destroy the squirrels forever...and BURN DOWN THE WHOLE DAMN FOREST!!!


Well, there you go. Next part coming soon. Once again, please tell me what you think.

[The Pope]

[carnivore-x]

...If that's what you want, then here you go! BTW, awesome picture. 

III

   Lil‘ Slugger. Dr. Fetus had been working on it for so long, it was his greatest creation. Powerful, deadly, destructive, and all at his control. The perfect brainchild.
   He strapped Bandage Girl to the back of his machine, and began to pour gasoline over the area. This was his most severe gauntlet of traps, but Lil‘ Slugger was immune.
   He could hear frightened chatters behind him. He had built the gauntlet right through the squirrel’s most populated area. If they tried to leave, they died. They were nervous, and rightfully so. They were trapped, waiting for the end.
   Dr. Fetus’s memory drifted back, to when work had first began on Lil‘ Slugger...
   Sparks flew and smoke charred the air. Young Dr. Fetus squeezed the squirrel’s juices into the engine. It sparked and fizzed. Squirrel blood seemed to be the perfect energizer to power his creation.
   Using his remote, he turned the machine on. It was too small for him to fit inside for now, but he would fix that later, and it marched around at his command, terrorizing the squirrels, sawing through the trees like nothing.
   Now if only he could make it shoot fire, then it would be perfect. He could destroy the whole forest!
   Dr. Fetus smiled at the memory. Lil‘ Slugger still didn’t shoot fire, but it didn’t need to. He could make fire on his own.
   Squishy footsteps warned him of Meat Boy’s approach. Dr. Fetus pretended to ignore him, still pouring gas over the ground. Meat Boy stared, and gasped.
   “What are you doing?” he yelled.
   Dr. Fetus glanced at him, grinning. “What do you think?” He pulled a match out of his pocket, and lit it.
   “Don’t!”
   It was too late. Dr. Fetus threw the match to the ground, laughing maniacally as the forest began to burn around him. The whole place was in smoking, flaming glory, and it made him feel wonderful.
   He hopped into Lil’ Slugger’s cockpit, now large enough for anyone, and began fiddling with the dials. Pressing buttons, pulling switches, sliding others. In moments, Lil’ Slugger started up. Dr. Fetus laughed, hands on the joysticks.
   Built like a chainsaw on legs, Lil’ Slugger had enough raw power to demolish the forest. At least twenty feet tall, robotic saws functioned like gears. Huge feet attached to powerful, pumping, metal legs, were enough to move his robot forward.
   Meat Boy took off running as fast as his puny legs could carry him. Dr. Fetus roared with laughter, and sent Lil’ Slugger forward in chase.
   Meat Boy was running right into the gauntlet. Dr. Fetus was surprised at the little bugger’s agility. He was carefully dodging the traps.
   The machine suddenly rocked. Dr. Fetus looked around, and saw that squirrels were swamping Lil’ Slugger, lunging into it. Suicidal squirrels? He had never heard of such a thing, and kept the machine marching forward.
   Lil’ Slugger rocked again, and Dr. Fetus looked back out at the squirrels.
   “What the hell is going on?” he growled.
   A squirrel lunged into one of the saws, and Dr. Fetus saw the truth. These weren’t suicidal squirrels! They were... kamikaze squirrels!
   They were targeting key points in his machine, gumming up the gears, and overall causing havoc. If this kept up, Lil’ Slugger might explode!
   Dr. Fetus gunned the walking chainsaw into high gear. He had to kill Meat Boy before it was too late!
   Fire was catching all over his machine, and the squirrels kept coming, bent on revenge against their murderous tormenter. Wrathful, he pushed Lil’ Slugger as fast as he could. There was Meat Boy up ahead, climbing up a huge wall... a huge wall?!
   Dr. Fetus tried to put on the brakes, but it was too late. Lil’ Slugger plowed straight into the wall, smashing against the rock. Meat Boy was at the top, just out of reach.
   The squirrels had worked well, for the back of Lil’ Slugger exploded, and it collapsed to the ground, destroyed. Dr. Fetus growled in frustration, and began pounding on the dashboard in front of him. He had been so close!
   He heard a knocking on some of the still intact glass, and saw Meat Boy standing there, looking at him and smiling.
   “Are you okay?” he asked. “Also, can I please have my girlfriend back?”
   Dr. Fetus stared at him. The audacity, after all that, to ask for Bandage Girl! That insufferable, self-centered twit!
   Dr. Fetus flipped Meat Boy off, then pressed a button on the dashboard, causing another explosion, this one sending Dr. Fetus’s seat, and Bandage Girl, rocketing into the air. His wings opened, and he took flight, leaving dead squirrels and a burning forest behind him.

That's the end of the Forest. Hope you enjoyed it. I might post Chapter 1.5 today, but I won't start the Hospital until tomorrow. I still need to edit that. For right now, though, I'm going to start writing the Factory.
  + =  +

[soad667]

Nice work! I found some time and decided to read the whole thing.

Really enjoyed it so far, keep it up.

[clap2times]

Excellent  ... Awesome  ... Beautiful 

I woke up this morning planing to right a story about super meat boy but you beat me to it, O well, I'll still have a go.
started the story, mentioned yours at the start (Not to be self promoting but here it is Tell me what you think  )

Again great story, please keep going 

[carnivore-x]

Wow, thanks everybody. Oh, clap2times, I did read your story, nice start.
Since this seems to be getting attention, (100 views! Hooray! ) I think I'll post the next part. Enjoy.

Chapter 1.5:The Inspector

   A ringing doorbell snapped Dr. Fetus out of the past. Grumbling incoherently, he stalked through the echoing mansion to the front door. Thrusting it open wide, he bellowed “Whaddya want?!”
   “Inspector Barton, of the PMPD,” answered a short, stout man outside the door. He was wearing a khaki suit, and a large hat. Dr. Fetus could make out a gun strapped to his waist.
   “PMPD?” Dr. Fetus asked. He’d never heard of it.
   “Planet McMillen Police Department,” Inspector Barton replied, looking official. “I am here with a warrant for your arrest.”
   “Arrest?!” Dr. Fetus said, surprised. “What the hell for?”
   “Destruction of forest property, desecration of hospitals and factories, over three hundred counts of kidnapping, attempted world domination, six hundred thousand successful murders of one Meat Boy, two attempted murders of one Brownie, and finally, two hundred million attempts to murder said Meat Boy. Also, blowing up the world.”
   “That was not me, or at least not the me standing here today,” Dr. Fetus growled irritably.
   “Very well, if we are counting things after your second birth,” Barton said with a sly look. “Destroying or enslaving all living things within the closest five counties, many, many cases of murder, and who knows what else? Your war tactics are very unorthodox, Mr. Fetus.”
   “That’s Dr. Fetus to you,” Dr. Fetus roared. “And on whose word do you have it that I actually did any of this?”
   “I have the word of one Samuel Hitt,” the inspector replied, now looking truly smug.
   “I know of no such person.”
   “I’m surprised, given that you created him. He mentioned you would know him better by the name Brownie.”
   “BROWNIE!!!!?????” Dr. Fetus bellowed, then lunged at the inspector, who nimbly dodged out of the way.
   “Yes, Brownie,” the inspector said, a triumphant smile spreading across his face. “You know him?”
   “GET OUT! NOW! DIE, YOU LITTLE FOOL!” Dr. Fetus screeched, leaping towards Barton, fists flying. Barton’s guard went up, and he snapped out a punch, catching the edge of Dr. Fetus’s jar. Dr. Fetus bellowed, narrowly dodging a sweeping kick, then continued his powerful attacks. He was beating Barton back.
   “I...am...stronger!” Dr. Fetus grunted.
   “You...are...nothing!” Inspector Barton growled back, grimacing.
   “Sir! Your blood pressure! Be careful!”
   Jensen had rushed out onto the scene of the fight. “Sir, you know what happens if you get too angry. Your pressure could get too high, and your brain would burst!”
   “Shut up, Jensen!” Dr. Fetus roared, still duking it out with the inspector. But Barton seemed intrigued, and rolled away from the mad fetus, coming up near Jensen.
   “What are you talking about, good sir?”
   “It is a unique condition, Inspector. If he gets too angry, it blows his mind as blood boils into it, effectively destroying his face.”
   “Hmmm,” Barton said. “Interesting.”
   “SHUT UP, JENSEN!” Dr. Fetus screeched, charging them both. Dust flew, and then it was over.
   Jensen was standing on the steps to the manor, brushing off the dust, with barely a scratch on him. Dr. Fetus’s jar was cracked, his tuxedo ripped, but he was still standing.
   Inspector Barton had it the worst, though. A huge bruise blackened his eye and most of his face, and his arm cracked and snapped when he moved it, making him wince.
   “You shall pay for this, Mr. Fetus,” the inspector seethed. “I shall return, and now I have the personal experience of resisting arrest to back up Samuel Hitt’s claims.”
   The inspector ran off, leaving Dr. Fetus glaring at his back. He flipped the retreating cop off, then stormed into the manor, a look of pure rage on his face.
      Curse that wretched traitor, Brownie! So he thought his name was Samuel Hitt, did he? He was Brownie, he was nothing compared to Dr. Fetus. Dr. Fetus was his creator, and that piece of genetically-engineered crap had turned on him! Dr. Fetus had destroyed him twice, and he would do it again, this time for good.
   “That will teach you, Brownie,” Dr. Fetus muttered. “I am your maker, your creator, your master. I made you, and I can unmake you!”
   This train of thought brought him back to when he first created Brownie: in the abandoned hospital, where he himself had first been born. There was an abundance of toxic waste there that created so many monstrous beings, Dr. Fetus hadn’t been able to resist...

There you go, I'll start posting the Hospital tomorrow. Did you catch the reference to the trailer, and what's funny about Brownie's name?  
 

[carnivore-x]

Okay, kind of forgot to put this in my last post.

Excellent  ... Awesome  ... Beautiful

I woke up this morning planing to right a story about super meat boy but you beat me to it, O well, I'll still have a go.
started the story, mentioned yours at the start (Not to be self promoting but here it is Tell me what you think  )

Again great story, please keep going 

I don't mind the self promotion at all, the reference in your story made my day. Self-promote all you want. Thanks a lot for the comment, as well.

[carnivore-x]

Just finished writing a very pivotal scene in the Factory. Just wanted to tell you. Back to work!

[carnivore-x]

Alright, I'm going to have a pretty busy day today, so I'll probably only get one section posted, but who knows?

Chapter 2: The Hospital

I

   Dr. Fetus’s wings flapped wickedly as he flew towards his new destination: the ruined hospital, the place of his birth. Perhaps Meat Boy would put two and two together and find him, but Dr. Fetus doubted it.
   “Where are you taking me?” Bandage Girl asked, wriggling in his arms. Dr. Fetus just smirked. She would find out soon enough.
   It didn’t take her long. “The hospital?! What happened to this place?”
   Dr. Fetus grinned darkly. He had happened, but she needn’t know that just yet.
   He stared at the dark, haunted place. It was rather creepy, really. It had been the largest hospital their world had known, and now it was merely a ruin.
   He swooped in for a solid landing, and a vicious smile spread across his face. He didn’t need to set up any traps. The place was defective, and it was a death trap in itself. Pools of contaminated blood, fans twirling out of control, deadly, semi-radioactive piles of needles and syringes. And there was a peculiar squelching sound that floated around the place, as if something was moving in there.
   Dr. Fetus gave an involuntary shudder, surprising himself. There had been rumors, of a creature born out of the radioactive blood sludge, one so vile that anything that touched it died.
   He set Bandage Girl up at the end of a corridor, piled high with needles. This would take Meat Boy a bit of work to get through. Dr. Fetus settled to explore the place.
   As he travelled, he noticed some locked doors, which would vanish if the proper key was collected. He could use this to his advantage...
   He had set up some special saw shooters, which were blocked by locks.
   “This should be interesting,” he muttered grimly.
   As he continued through the place, he caught the sound of squelching, some behind the walls, some out in the open. He shivered. If that creature, the Contaminated Hazardous Abominable Demon, found him, it would be over. He paused, realizing that C.H.A.D was a good acronym, and continued on.
   He rounded a bend, dodging some rubble and contaminated blood, and found himself staring at the most surprising sight.
   Crawling from the blood were little miniature C.H.A.D’s, tiny and bloody, oozing all over the walls as the clambered around. Dr. Fetus was fascinated. These things must be deadly. If he could harness their power...
   No. They were too volatile, even for him. They would merely be there, and hopefully be in Meat Boy’s way while they were at it.
   Still, the idea of genetic mutation intrigued him. Maybe he could create something, something more powerful than Meat Boy, alike, but darker...
   A cruel smile spread over his face as he stalked away from the blood swamp, leaving a few saw blades behind. He knew just the thing.
   He would need some materials to work with. Where could he find some?
   The rumbling and squelching behind the walls startled him. It sounded close, and he could hear a deep, liquid voice moaning. Dr. Fetus blanched. He didn’t want to face C.H.A.D, not now, not ever. The rumors were terrible. For the first time in his life, fear entered Dr. Fetus, and he let out a moan.
   The sounds behind the walls stopped immediately.
   “It heard me,” Dr. Fetus realized, muttering the words under his breath. He heard a watery roar, and a loud banging behind the walls, and did the only thing he could.
   Dr. Fetus, wicked, powerful, and monstrous, ran for his life.

There you go! Hopefully I'll have some time to post the next part tonight. But if not, you'll have to wait until tomorrow.

[carnivore-x]

Okay, I do need to slow down my post count, or else what I'm posting will catch up with what I've written!
So it will probably only be one a day for awhile. Maybe.

II

   He could hear rumblings and liquid splats behind him, as the creature pursued. He spun around corners at break-neck speed, hoping to lose the beast in the twisting, maze-like passages of the hallway.
   Eventually, the sounds of C.H.A.D ceased, and Dr. Fetus slowed his pace to a walk. He had to be careful, now that the beast knew he was here. It would be hunting him.
   It was only then that Dr. Fetus got a good look at his dim surroundings. He let out a surprised gasp.
   It was the birthing rooms, long corridors of them, in a state of ruinous disrepair. Dr. Fetus shuddered. He should not have chosen this hospital as a base of operations, there were far too many bad memories here.
   A wailing moan from in front of him made him freeze. Had the beast returned?
   The wail came again, and he relaxed a bit. It didn’t sound like C.H.A.D. He peered forward, curiosity piqued.
   A blobby, purple thing floated towards him, bouncing from floor to ceiling, and screeching. Dr. Fetus gasped. He knew what this was. He had released them, shortly after his birth. The combination of the mutated disease and his surroundings thrust his mind into the past...
   Chaos. Absolute Chaos. And in the center of it, an enraged fetus, who should not have even been alive.
   The fetus laughed, holding a miniature remote in his tiny hand, repeatedly pressing the button in maniacal anger. With each press, things in the hospital exploded, including a container, holding contagious diseases, which bounced all over the place, infecting everything in sight.
   The fetus worked quickly, grabbing utensils, fluids, and jars from all over, building himself a robotic suit. He hopped inside. It wasn’t finely dressed, yet, but it would do.
   He needed a name. Perhaps just Fetus. “No,” the fetus growled. “Dr. Fetus.”
   Armed with a remote, a robotic suit, and a name, Dr. Fetus began his rampage through the hospital.
   As it turned out, there was quite a bit of toxic medical waste, and he began to dump it all over, into the blood, into the needles, onto the people.
   He saw a flash of pink in the distance, something that had survived the rampage. He hurried after it, but the chase was futile. He found nothing, except for a floating pink bandage. For some reason he didn’t understand, at least not yet, he picked it up, kept it with him. It felt... comforting, somehow.
   Soon, the hospital was nothing but a smoking ruin. He though he heard wailings and squelches in the distance, but he couldn’t be sure.
   Young Dr. Fetus walked out of the hospital. He needed a good tailor, and then, he would begin his life.
   An alarm snapped Dr. Fetus out of the memory. He hated the fact, but he still longed to go back into the past.
   But the alarm meant Meat Boy had reached Bandage Girl. Time to up the ante.
   Dr. Fetus quickly warped Bandage Girl away, into an even harder gauntlet. A thought then occurred to him. He would never be able to set up deadly traps, or evil mutant minions, if he was constantly moving Bandage Girl.
   He built a robot quickly. It wouldn’t do anything fancy, but it would move Bandage Girl when necessary, and give him a chance to work on his project.
   The germs had convinced him further. This combination of radioactivity and materials that came from a formerly living being made for a new, monstrous creature. And Dr. Fetus was going to create one of his own.
   He couldn’t allow himself to be distracted by the past anymore. He began collecting radioactive materials. As he collected, a thought came to him.
   “Imagine,” he muttered. “Radioactivity over the entire world...”
   It was certainly something to think about.
   Soon, he had collected the suitable ingredients. All that was left was something to bring to life. Dr. Fetus knew exactly what he needed.
   He crouched over the pile of radioactive material, pulled down his pants,  and opened the waste compartment in his suit. A large amount of fetal fecal matter poured onto the radioactive pile. Dr. Fetus stepped back to watch the show.
   It was glowing, a brown and yellow whirl. A figure began to take shape, almost the same shape as Meat Boy, but darker. Dr. Fetus grinned, a grin of pure evil.
   “Welcome to the world...Brownie.”

How do you like that for a section ending? Mua-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaa!

[carnivore-x]

Hospital part 3, coming up! (It's a pretty long part, so be happy.)

III

   “Brownie? Is that my name?” the figure asked as the dust cleared.
   “Yes, my creation, it is. You are a radioactive pile of my crap, but with training, you could be my greatest minion.”
   Brownie looked a bit confused. He was hideous, a repulsive brown color, like diarrhea, almost watery, with a mouth full of dull teeth. His eyes were a milky yellow, and glowed faintly in the spooky lighting.
   “Your...greatest minion?”
   “Yes. You shall help me destroy Meat Boy!”
   “Why? That doesn’t sound very nice.”
   “Oh, but it is, Brownie,” Dr. Fetus said, trying to sound sincere. This accursed minion already had a conscience! That could be trouble, so he had to trick Brownie with a half truth.
   “You see,” Dr. Fetus continued. “Meat Boy is a scourge upon the land. See the ruin that this hospital has become? He caused it. And he has wronged me deeply, forced me out of society.” Dr. Fetus tried to force a tear, but found he could not.
   Brownie, however, teared up for him. “I’m so sorry,” he said, looking at Dr. Fetus with pity.
   “It is sad,” Dr. Fetus said. “And he has wronged a girl as well, named Bandage Girl. We must protect her, and that is why I must train you.”
   “Oh, I’ll help protect her,” Brownie said, looking grim. “How dare he? Meat Boy is going down!”
   “Good, my minion, good! I know exactly what we can do.”
   Dr. Fetus led Brownie across the hospital, and began to train him. He started off improving his muscle skills, getting him to run and jump, then began with more advanced techniques, like sliding up walls. The two of them lunged from wall to wall, narrowly avoiding death, racing through the hospital, dodging lasers.
   “This is so much fun!” Brownie shouted, laughing a bit. “I wish all training was like this!”
   Dr. Fetus also allowed himself a smile. Brownie was the perfect minion, better than Meat Boy ever could be.
   As they reached the top of a shattered tower, they heard a squelching and rumbling in the walls. Dr. Fetus paled, but Brownie looked curious.
   “What is that?” he asked, his voice echoing. The sounds immediately stopped.
   “That,” Dr. Fetus whispered. “Is C.H.A.D, and he is very dangerous. I recommend we run.”
   The pipes above them squeaked and squealed, and a loud rumbling came from them, along with bloody, watery roars.
   “He’s traveling through the pipes!” Brownie shouted, and together, the two took off running.
   They could hear C.H.A.D in the background, sliding from pipe to pipe. Dr. Fetus spotted a door, and sprinted to it, hoping to lose C.H.A.D. Brownie noticed, and followed.
   Dr. Fetus burst through the door, and tumbled down, toward a pit of contaminated blood, banging off of large pipes, making a racket, until he managed to wrap his arms around one.
   The pipes around him began to shake, and spout blood, raising the pool below him. Dr. Fetus gasped, guessing what was coming, and began to leap from pipe to pipe, acrobatically lunging to the top.
   One pipe began to rumble and shudder more than the others, and Dr. Fetus knew C.H.A.D was coming. He hurried, he was almost to the top!
   But the next pipe he jumped to, the last one before the top, couldn’t support his weight. It snapped, and C.H.A.D plummeted out of another one, landing in the blood.
   Dr. Fetus fell, knowing it was all over, that C.H.A.D was going to destroy him. His only regret was that he hadn’t obliterated Meat Boy.
   And then there was a hand gripping his wrist, a slimy, repulsive, wonderful hand. Brownie!
   Dr. Fetus looked up at Brownie. He was so trusting, so exploitable. Dr. Fetus smiled, and Brownie began pulling him up.
   “I couldn’t just let you die,” Brownie said. “Not after all you’ve been through.”
   Below him, C.H.A.D bellowed and hopped, upset at not catching Dr. Fetus. He roared, reaching upward towards Dr. Fetus and Brownie, who had finally reached the doorway, and were standing, looking down at the pit-like room. The blood was still rising, but the flow was slowing.
   “Let’s get out of here,” Dr. Fetus said, stalking away. “If we’re lucky, he’ll be trapped in there, and won’t bother us anymore.”
   “Wait!” Brownie said, poking his head back into the pipe room. The blood flow had stopped, and, like Dr. Fetus had predicted, C.H.A.D was trapped. He had realized his predicament, and was swimming in the blood, moaning and looking pleadingly up towards the door.
   “He seems...sad,” Brownie said. Something like tears glistened in C.H.A.D’s eyes. He groveled, hopping up toward the door, waving his little hands, and dropping back into the blood.
   “He’s sort of cute, really,” Brownie said, smiling. C.H.A.D could be considered cute, maybe. He was large, blob-like, and red, with a huge, gaping mouth that had a few pointed teeth. Blood and tissue glistened, and his eyes were dark, begging pits. Two tiny hands waved like those of a baby, and he had a small tail, the same shape as the hands.
   “Cute?” Dr. Fetus scoffed. “He’s a monster, and deserves to be trapped in there.”
   “What did you say C.H.A.D stood for, boss?” Brownie asked.
   “I didn’t. If you must know, though, it stands for Contaminated Hazardous Abominable Demon,” Dr. Fetus replied.
   “Hmmm,” Brownie said thoughtfully, trying to ignore C.H.A.D’s piteous wailing.
   “What, Brownie?”
   “I think, maybe it stands for Contaminated Hugging Adorable Demon.”
   “What? No, it can’t, I made it up!” Dr. Fetus said, irked.
   “Well, I think mine is more accurate.”
   Dr. Fetus’s eyelid twitched.
   “No, boss, look,” Brownie said, pointing down at C.H.A.D. “He’s lonely. Who knows how long he’s been stuck roaming this hospital? Everyone is afraid of him, because he’s so big and deadly, but he’s just a softie at heart. That’s why he followed us. He just wants some company!”
   C.H.A.D moaned, and gave the pair a gap-toothed smile.
   “C.H.A.D!” Brownie called. “You want some company? You want someone to play with?”
   C.H.A.D’s smile widened, and his hops got bigger, as if he were excited.
   “Who cares what he wants?” Dr. Fetus asked.
   “Don’t you see, boss?” Brownie asked, a smile spreading across his face. “He’s so lonely for company, he’d take anyone, even scum like Meat Boy. If we could somehow get him in the same spot as Meat Boy, he’d try to get so close to him, to hug him, he’d kill Meat Boy! C.H.A.D doesn’t know his own strength or danger, it’d be perfect!”
   Dr. Fetus grinned. Brownie was right! That was the perfect way to destroy Meat Boy.
   “Brownie, my boy, you truly are the greatest minion I could ever have. You have excelled in training, saved my life, and, best of all, come up with an absolutely wonderful way to kill Meat Boy forever!”
   Dr. Fetus laughed maniacally, and Brownie joined in, before calling down to C.H.A.D.
   “Hey, buddy! Stay there for a little while, okay? We have a friend who will be coming through, and when he gets to a good spot, we’ll send you down to meet him! You’ll love him!”
   C.H.A.D jumped with joy, doing flips, then waved at Brownie and Dr. Fetus as the two walked away. They had a trap to set.


Alright, only one part left in the Hospital. Then Chapter 2.5, and then the Factory, which I just started writing part four of.

[A_K__]

this is awesome!!!! 
when is the next post???

[carnivore-x]

Right now! BTW, does anyone know the exact name given to the demons in Hell and the flying zombie gobbler things in Rapture? Not what you call them, but what Team Meat calls them. Thanks.

IV

   “Brownie, I need you to hide,” Dr. Fetus said. “I don’t want Meat Boy to know about you quite yet. You could watch C.H.A.D kill him, though.”
   Brownie ran off, climbing a tunnel to watch the show. Dr. Fetus opened a door, and pulled Bandage Girl into the room.
   They were in an observation deck, overlooking a stagnant pool of blood, guarded by a railing
   “What is this place?” Bandage Girl asked.
   “Where your boyfriend shall finally meet his well-deserved death,” Dr. Fetus chuckled. Before Bandage Girl could respond, he grabbed her, and shoved her into a pipe.
   Unfortunately, she wouldn’t really fit. Her front half was in, but the back half was still stuck out. Dr. Fetus growled, and began shoving her in, repeatedly pushing, until he heard squishy footsteps. Meat Boy had arrived.
   “Brownie,” Dr. Fetus whispered. “Get C.H.A.D ready.”
   “All set, boss!” Brownie’s voice came in through an intercom. “He’s ready to go! I called him.”
   Dr. Fetus grinned, yanked out a remote, and pressed the button.
   Alarms blared as blood poured out of other pipes, filling the pool. Suddenly the flow slackened, and a rumbling came from the pipes.
   “Ahm, boss? He’s stuck.”
   Dr. Fetus grimaced, and began repeatedly pounding on the button. The rumbling increased, and he could see C.H.A.D starting to slide through the pipes. Dr. Fetus cringed. He still didn’t like the idea of C.H.A.D. It was just a bit creepy. Then there was a splash, and everything went red.
   Dr. Fetus wiped blood off of his jar, and glanced down at the grinning C.H.A.D.
   “HUH...HUH...HI!” C.H.A.D said, smiling. Meat Boy looked frightened.
   “What...is that?”
   “FUH...FUR...FRUH...FRIEND!” C.H.A.D said, and leaped into the air.
   “Ack!” Meat Boy said, and lunged away, jumping off a wall.
   The two were trapped in a large tower, blocked off at intervals by the locked doors. There were bits of wall shoved out, which Meat Boy was leaping to, trying to reach the key. Dr. Fetus booted Bandage Girl into the pipe with a powerful kick, then climbed up to watch the show.
   Meat Boy had already grabbed the first key, and C.H.A.D was going nuts as the blood began to rise. Was something wrong? After all, the only thing at the top of the tower was open sky, so Meat Boy would have nowhere to go.
   C.H.A.D soon got over his fear, and was leaping and laughing again. Dr. Fetus wormed over to another spot to watch, and found himself next to Brownie.
   “He’s going to survive!” Brownie growled, angered.
   “He might not,” Dr. Fetus said. “After all, he has nowhere to go.”
   But this turned out to be less true than they thought. Meat Boy reached the final segment of tower, and grabbed the final keys. The roof opened, and sunlight streamed in.
   “NUH...NUH...NOOOOOOOOO! LUH-LIGHT BAAAAAADDDDD!!!” C.H.A.D shouted, looking stricken. He rumbled, and began to shrink.
   “No!” Brownie shouted. Dr. Fetus swore. Meat Boy had defeated C.H.A.D, the deadly monster! With sunlight, of all things! That would explain why C.H.A.D had stayed in the hospital, though.
   “Brownie,” Dr. Fetus said. “Run ahead to the Salt Factory. You know the place?”
   “Yeah,” Brownie said. “I’ll meet you there.” He took off, but for some reason, it looked like the wrong direction. Dr. Fetus shook his head. Brownie would arrive in time.
   Dr. Fetus crawled out onto a balcony, overlooking the surrounding area. In the distance, he could just vaguely see smog rising up, from the area near the factory.
   “Get me down!” Bandage Girl said. The pipe he had shoved her into had sucked her upwards until it deposited her, upside down, in a cage. Dr. Fetus laughed, and began undoing the cage. He used the ropes to tie her up.
   “Meat Boy survived your trap, didn’t he?” Bandage Girl said. “You wouldn’t be moving me if he hadn’t.”
   Dr. Fetus growled, picked her up, and threw her off the balcony. She was far too irritating.
   He could hear squelches from behind him. They almost sounded like... kissing noises?
   Dr. Fetus shrugged, pulled out an umbrella, and glided down. Looking back up, he could see Brownie running away, as if he had seen something horrible. Dr. Fetus couldn’t care less. Brownie was on his side.
   Landing on the ground, he picked up Bandage Girl, and teleported away, towards the factory.
   It figured, really. He had gone to the place of his childhood, and then place of his birth. Now, he was going to his father’s factory. He had made a similar journey earlier...
   Young Dr. Fetus winged his way down a polluted, dull path, through the smog. Betrayal, foul betrayal! He had followed up on the trail to find out who his mother was, but it was futile. She had betrayed him.
   Now, though, there was another path to take. His father was still out there, running a factory. If Dr. Fetus could take over, his power would be absolute!
   His father had also betrayed him, by never coming to find him. But now, he would find his father, and destroy him. The Salt Factory would soon be under the control of Fetus Corp.
   Dr. Fetus smirked. He owned the factory now, and, as everyone knew, Salt+ Meat = DEATH!!!
   Dr. Fetus laughed, startling Bandage Girl. If the salt wasn’t enough, the conveyor belts and factory defense system should be more than plenty to kill Meat Boy.
   And perhaps, finally, it would be time for his reveal. She would know who had captured her, and she would be sorry.
   “Yes, you’ll be sorry,” Dr. Fetus muttered under his breath, so that she couldn’t hear. “You’ll be sorry...mother!”


  0___o Yeah, I just did that! Ha-ha! And that doesn't even get brought back up until Chapter 3, so you won't get more info until tomorrow at the earliest. Constructive criticism is much appreciated. Please be honest, I can take it, don't worry, but remember, constructive criticism. That means: "There's a part here that really isn't as good as the others: (shows part) you should work on it. (Gives a possible way to improve, or at least what they thought was wrong)" That is good. "This part sucks!" may be honest, or even accurate, but it is not helpful at all, as it doesn't give me anything to go on to improve. Okay, rant over. Hope you liked this part!